Monday, April 6, 2009

The Dogwoods Got Me Thinkin’

My favorite quote from my second favorite book:

“…I felt as a rock must feel when the waterfall has pounded on it all day long.”

I think of this line often especially when I am tired after a long day. I thought of it recently as I watched the beautiful dogwood trees in my backyard trying desperately to point their faces into the afternoon sun. I felt like I was in Kansas again with the not-so-gentle breezes that were tossing us around that day. Actually, as I write this, days later, the winds have returned and my wind chimes have been dancing wildly all day. (Note to self: buy Sam a kite)

I watched the wind toss the beautiful dogwoods around and noticed how each time the wind calmed, the blossoms would soak up as much sun as they could in the small amount of time they had been granted before the gale returned.


Finally, the wind stopped, and the little blossoms, a little worse for wear, turned their faces again to the sun…without dwelling on how long their afternoon had been or the struggles they had faced.


Honestly, I do believe this is how I try to live my life. It doesn’t seem to do any good dwelling on the past or the struggle. I have never been a “Why me?” type of person. I remember during high school (many moons ago) telling my mother “Why not me?” I can’t even remember what had happened but I do know that if I have a mantra, that’s it. I pray many times during the day, but I never pray for myself unless I am asking for strength. I pray for others but I mostly send up prayers of gratitude all throughout the day. (Big one going up for Stellan today! read more here)

That’s not to say I don’t struggle nor that I don’t get tired. But I do find myself more often patiently waiting adversity out, looking forward to those moments when I can simply turn my face to soak up the sun.

Saturday, while trying to get rid of a seemingly harmless folder that was taking up a lot of room on my hard drive, I wiped out 75,000+ files and folders. It took a few minutes, but I wasn’t quite sure what to do. When I clicked delete, I had only selected 5,000 items. The number just kept growing and growing…

computer woes

I did cry when my husband called to say hi. I did panic a little at the thought of losing thousands of pictures I’ve taken, thousands of fonts I’ve collected, and tons upon tons of clipart, projects, digital downloads, and documents. Thanks to a friend from high school that read my Facebook status, and who apparently grew up to become a smarty pants, I’ve been able to rescue just about everything I lost that I cared about.

I’ve been sitting here working for two days. My butt hurts, I have a headache, I work in short stretches so that I don’t completely neglect Sam, and this is a very long and confusing process. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel. And, this was probably a really good thing after all. I cleared out some files that I’ve been carrying around for years, from computer to computer. It feels good to lighten my load, gain a little hard drive space, do a little spring cleaning. It is Spring break after all!

Speaking of being on Spring break this week, I am spending lots of time with Sam and have some very cool posts coming!

God, thank you for blessing me with this incredibly cool kid.

1 comment:

Jennifer Juniper said...

In the last page I have now developed a new phobia...nodeletitis! I'm terrified to delete now since it was so easy to get into your predicament.

Though, I realize now I probably couldn't even FIND the page you were deleting from, so my ignorance may just save me. :)